Tonight, lacking anything particularly interesting to do, I ventured yet again into the wilds of North Vancouver. This was originally supposed to be an attempt to play pool. Now, having made the decision to play some pool, one has to find a pool hall. Couldn’t find one for a long time, a reason for this was probably the fact that I refused to look one up in the phone book, assuming that I would find one – just around the corner. Well, I quickly got bored of playing pool anyway, and ended up just driving up around Lynn Valley, and then up in the hills way above West Vancouver – all the time looking for Christmas lights. At least they were a little easier to find than the damn pool hall. I also attempted to go to a movie in North van, but it was sold out. Guess that what I get for going on a Saturday night. Usually, going to a movie, I go on a weekday afternoon, because the theatres are empty and I can sit wherever I want.

Going from Coquitlam to West Van, and back again, I ran into no less than three “Have you been drinking tonight sir”? road checks. At least this time they didn’t even pull me off the side to investigate the blind that shields the back of my car from curious onlookers. Of course, I hadn’t been drinking, and in fact, haven’t since New Years Eve. This is probably why I get so bored sitting at home. Perhaps I should stand.

Its been a really long time since I wrote anything here. The predominant reason for this is that I have been knee deep into too many exams to properly navigate without some sort of cognitive damage. So, as a cost, the writing here has suffered, actually disappearing entirely. I am sure that there are those out there, especially that one person in Australia (you know who you are, if in fact you still read this…) who would actually cheer this absence of words. Anyway, I digress from the point that I never had in the first place.

Suffice to say that the exams have been rather brutal, which is what I get for taking science. Organic chemistry was my first exam, and it was the most I have ever studied for one test in my life. This was largely due to some sort of strange motivation to do well, and not because it was the most difficult test I have ever taken. However, the results were not all that stellar, and I am not sure that all the studying I did in the entire week before the exam was really worth it. The animal physiology (Bisc 305) exam went much better, which was rather invigorating after doing so badly and feeling despair during organic chemistry.

It seems that I never hear anything on the news these days that have to do with new discoveries in science or other parts of life that I do not question. I am always being told of really good things that are apparently happening, but I am too cynical to believe. Those things that seem really bad, I don’t believe either. It looks like I’ll have to have to stop questioning long enough to actually trust something. Answers are out there. Aren’t they?

So the rest of this exam period will be spent studying for my last exam, which is Environmental Toxicology. The thing that scares me is that this exam doesn’t’ scare me. It should be interesting. So then, the problem turns to what to do for the next many weeks. Sure, Christmas is in two weeks, but that is usually, well, not bad but just not too fulfilling. The things is nice, but it just seems that it is like just about any other day at my parents house. I wonder what will happen this year, as they haven’t done any decorating (which is unheard of so late in the month) or any of the normal pre-Christmas activities. As I no longer live with them (thank goodness!) I, of course, don’t have all the information. Its just that things are, lacking in normal intensity, which, granted is usually at a very low level anyway. Hmmm. This is coming from the high school kid who hated weekends because that would mean two whole days of NOTHING. The real problem is that not much of that has changed, and without school, there is an absence of anything wavering from the line of monotone. I guess that I need a hobby, which seems an “old-person” word, and I am starting to feel the part.

I think that its time to go, things might start to get a little cathartic here, and nobody wants that.

All that I really want to know is why it seems so difficult to coordinate more than two people. What I am referring to, of course, is the phenomenon of the often futile attempt to get… say… around 6 people together for dinner or ANY event. I remember a few years ago, in an event that seems typical of the overall situation. We were all trying to get together, after school, for dinner…. somewhere. Sometimes, the most difficult part is ok, what are we going to do (now that we have decided that we are going to do something). So we decided to go for dinner. What eventually happened was, two of the eight got lost, three of the six went to the wrong restaurant, me and whatshername got to the right place, on time, but nobody else showed up. The other guy finally did show, but he left to find the others. In a city that is usually difficult. It took two hours after our original meeting time to finally corral everything and get them in the right place. Whew.

My point here is that, no matter how well an event is planned, everything will go to pieces. Nobody knows exactly why this is, but Murphy’s law has at least something to do with it. So for tomorrow, as I go to meet an undetermined amount of people in order to study (sorry… not something that exciting), who know what will happen. Some will go to the wrong place, others will think its the different day, and……..

So lately Ive just been screwing around with animations on this page. I took most of them out, because the thing just became alive and it was detracting from any sort of concentration someone could have when reading the words. Oh well, however, some of them still are in the “chaos” section. This is a section I leave for experiments, and assorted junk that won’t fit anywhere else (or there for that matter). Well, I was only going to update this page when I had something real to say, this attempt seems to have failed, so I’ll try again later. If the words don’t come, they just don’t come.

So imagine that you are pretty sure that the air flinging itself up against your place of residence is going to result in, among other things, a power outage. This was my situation last night, and thus I decided to remember where the flashlights and lighter/candles were. Naturally, when the power did finally decide to leave, I couldn’t remember where I decided to put them. After flailing around in the dark, I managed to find the fridge, and my knee found the edge of the bookshelf. All in all, a textbook power outage. Well, I finally managed to get some light going. Of course, what then? Usually, I listen to the radio, but I was out of batteries for the big radio I have. I managed to find my old walkman, and after pilfering the AA’s from my VCR remote, I managed to wind up with batteries in my walkman. This would have been much better if the walkman worked. So I took it apart, which is not a solution for all problems (not that I would know). So after an hour, I got it working. Unfortunately, I could only pick up FM stations, and just try to get news type information over the FM frequencies in Vancouver. Not going to happen. After many attempts at raising any sort of AM station, I gave up and went to bed. This sleeping thing has been a problem recently for many reasons. Last night the main problem was the 100+ km/hr winds slamming in the my windows, and the fact that the patio furniture on the patio above my basement suite decided to do laps or something. They just kept slamming around all night long.

One good (almost) thing that did happen was that the power was out at the University, and there were no classes. Naturally, I found this out after driving all the way up there. It was definitely a weird experience trying to negotiate my way through very dark hallways with my own flashlight, with nobody else to be seen. Definitely weird. My power is back on now (only a few hours ago though), and is threatening to go out again because of the second storm in as many nights. I hope the patio furniture will forgo their gymnastics tonight.

I have discovered many things in my life that will interfere with my ability to sleep. Some of these are well worth being tired the next day, however, the one I discovered last night was not really worth it. Last night I made the unfortunate decision to purchase eggnog, a substance that I have a rather high affinity for. However, my mind and my body to not always agree, and that particular power struggle reaffirmed itself again last night. It seems that my mind wanted to drink some eggnog. “I deal with temptation by yielding to it.” –attributed to Mark Twain. However, things got out of hand, and before clearer heads prevailed, I had ingested about a litre of the stuff. Hmmm, didn’t get sick or anything, but sleep was an elusive figure last night. In fact, I didn’t get ANY sleep last night, and can only blame myself for my eggnog transgressions. It wasn’t like I was held down and forcefed the stuff was it? I actually surrendered myself to consciousness and just got up early and went to school. So I’ll add this to the list of things not to do right before I go to bed. Last weeks addition on the list : don’t drink two litres of orange juice before you go to bed either. If I had ingested alcohol, I could have understood the problems. By the way, if you ever have a hangover, Never open a can of dogfood.

Should I be apprehensive about all this year 2000 glitch stuff? I think that even more annoying than any problems that will result from it is the popular term now being used : Y2K . AAAAAAAHHH. Somehow, this term just grates me the wrong way. Is “Year 2000” too long for people to say? Maybe we should talk completely in abbreviations? Maybe I should just stop looking for things to make sense. Like the phenomenon of hot water heaters…. why do you have to heat hot water. As for the year 2000, I have heard everything from 1) Nothing will happen and 2) everything will happen. Everything being all things that are rather bad. I don’t know, but I do know that I would like to kick every programer/engineers ass that decided to continue the mind numbing stupidity of maintining the convention of a two digit date that was only done because “thats the way its always been done”. Couldn’t everybody have woken up ten years ago to the fact that these systems might still be in use when the actual date turned into the dreaded “00”? Just a thought.

So let us presume that you have decided to buy a CD. Probably not too foreign an experience for most of you. Lets say you know exactly which CD that you want. You see, this is what happened today. I had two CD’s that I wanted to buy, one that I could easily find, and another that proved more difficult to track down. I never did find that second CD (despite many frustrating shopping experiences….). My point here is…. what category do you look for a CD in these days? Most CD’s that I buy end up in the store’s pop/rock section, which these days, basically covers almost everything. So I look there. No CD to be found. I eventually find it in the “Alternative”. Alternative to what, I am not quite sure, since all the other music that was there seemed pretty mainstream. Anyway, I did not buy this CD there, as I was still holding out for the one that they didn’t have. So off to the next store I go. They don’t have either one. Now, at the third mall, I go to the HMV store that is in that particular mall. Still, they don’t have the first CD, though now the second is in the pop/rock section. After a few more stores, I still couldn’t find it (I was really determined to get my hands on this CD – my music has been feeling a bit stale lately…). So now, on my third mall, I yet again go to HMV. They don’t have the first CD there either, however, guess where the second is found! Pop/Rock? Alternative? No….. now this thing was in the new releases section, and in the FOLK section!! There is definitely NOTHING folk about this CD at all! I think that they must put something in the water where these people live because they all acted like automatons, just like every other CD store that I went to today. I think that they breed all these cranky CD store people in the same factory. Its time for a new model. I told the clerk-girl-person how this CD was in a different section at each store, and asked how anybody is supposed to figure out where to look for a CD. I said that they should have all classes of music in one big section, all in alphabetical order, with no confusing sections like they have now. She said that well, “like, that would eliminate, like all the, like, sections. I didn’t have the strength the argue.

For the more sensitive viewers out there… such as those with heartbeats, respiratory rhythms, or skin, I will not go into detail on the following. I am sure that you will all have some idea what I mean by the following statement:

I have little doubt that we were, in some way, evolved from animals when I see what transpires in public washrooms. I have even more doubt that we were evolved from anything when I have the misfortune to visit a gas station washroom. I believe, that given a few years, which means somewhere in around 2010, there will be a new, possibly higher, form of life emanate from a gas station toilet. Just a theory

I registered for my courses this morning, which is done on a phone system (I use the term system loosely). I am sure that the SFU teleregistration voice will still do voiceovers on my nightmares when I am old (say, 30). The most exciting part of this experience was getting up at 7:30, and not getting through until around 9:00. That is a lot of busy signals, and a lot of calls, which a I approximated at (I had a lot of time to think) around 900 (10 per minute). Seems that there is this population dynamics course that is required fare before a biology degree is awarded. This course was full last time they offered it, and when I first attempted to get into it (Spring, 1998). This spring semester (which I just registered for) is the next time they are offering it. FUll Full Full Full FUll….!!!!! @%$*ing school. I am going to go down to the bio department tomorrow to complain to the unforgiving battleaxes behind the counter. Won’t do any good, but it might keep me from running into traffic. I’, pretty pissed off, this degree will take me 10 years, all of it waiting for this course. Mad I am, and if you don’t tell anybody, neither will I.

Friday the thirteenth has been a good day for me. This was not the way that it began, however, but certain events and certain discussions that I had today pumped up its redeeming value. Maybe tomorrow I will mention the bad things that happened today, but right now I am in too good a mood. I will, however talk about the following incident.

I have gone on the record recently with much to do about driving. This is to say that I have done my fair share (perhaps more) of complaining about the drivers loose on our roads. Two months ago I could have maintained that I had not had a speeding ticket, or a car accident (that was in any part my fault). Well, those of you that have either been reading this page for a while, or have read the archives, will know that I managed to back into another car recently. I maintain that this was not of compete incompetence as there was a bus running over the front of my? car. I have also complained much about the speed that drivers seem to want to travel these days, putting themselves and others in danger. You know who you are. Well I, a self proclaimed non speeder, recently joined the ranks of the ticketed. Photo radar caught me on one of my jaunts to North Vancouver. Ahhhhh…… very displeased. Not so much with myself, as one might expect, but with the mechanics of the system under which I was ticketed. I am not condoning any foray over the speed limit, but when I have to pay a $115 fine for going NINE kilometers over the speed limit, I get a bit ticked. I think that photo radar, in selected locations, is a good idea. However, ticketing drivers for rather paltry speed limit transgressions seems a bit petty. But, money IS the name of the game isn’t it? I was going 59 in a 50 zone, got caught, am now poorer by $115, and also a little bit more of a hypocrite than before.

That is enough complaining for now.

I have decided that there is a definite lack of….. Well what do you call it? Why can I not go to a movie or theatre type experience and not be bothered by inconsiderate yahoos? The usual theatre (cinema or actual drama theatre, and even music concerts) experience consists of the following: 1) talking – the running commentary guy just always sits behind me, 2) another person, sitting adjacent to the loud-talker, will usually have a disease that causes intense spasms in the foot which can only be alleviated by kicking the back of the chair in which I sit, 3) the person sitting next to them will have some sort of nasal, respiratory problem that causes intense coughing and hacking up phlegm the size of alley cats, 4) the person sitting with all three of the aforementioned will have supplied everyone in the area with food materials (bought at exorbitant prices from the concessions) that are, by definition, composed mostly (by weight) of crinkly, plastic-like materials that make the utmost amount of noise possible. I guess the word that I was looking for was respect, or maybe consideration? I just do not know why this is not something that most people seem to exhibit while in public. I am not saying that nobody has consideration for others these days, just that the amount of people that do not show such things are becoming higher profile and even more annoying. This does not just exhibit itself in terms of a movie theatre (or other place). This happens everywhere. I see it everywhere, in the checkout line at the grocer (the stories I could tell), driving to school (ever been cut off and then they slow right……….d……o………….w……………………n), at the bank, just about everywhere that people can interact with each other, the incidence of disrespect for others is escalating. Its not like i am some old fart who is complaining about “kids these days….!!”, I happen to be 23, and while that may seem old to the 19 year old people I know, its just over the hill just yet.

So what do you do to the obnoxious ones out there? I once spoke up in a movie theatre and addressed the crowd behind me (of whom exhibited most of the 1-4 things listed above). I said something like :

Will you please be quiet? I mean saying the odd sarcastic or funny comment is something

that is most of us are guilty but do you have to be so continuous about it ? And you – over
there… do you have some sort of spasm problem? The back of my seat looks like an aluminium
cup that has been beaten with a bat. And you – give me that chocolate bar – I’ll open it myself
and I will take under 5 minutes which is half as long as you took for your last one!!!

Well, I said something like that anyway. I really did! I swear that I am not making this up. This was all, of course, much to the chagrin of my girlfriend who was usually embarrassed to be seen with me anyway (or acted like it….) and this was just not a good thing to do to begin changing that. Wow. Actually, while my little outburst created much attention – and ultimately got two of the four knuckleheads behind me kicked out of the movie, but only after the head knucklehead threatened somewhat of a violent action against the usher (who looked like she was 12). To her credit (the usher) I thought she was going to kick his ass, not the other way around!

Anyway, my overall point is that actually doing something about this will possible give a favourable response. Don’t put up with it, thought I might avoid confronting that biker guy at the grocery store no matter how annoying he becomes (not that I know anything about that). I don’t, however, know what to do about the traffic altercations that occur. Calgary, Alberta has an interesting thing that I wish was present here. They have a number that people can call if they witness a traffic transgression. The police may even follow up on it, and will keep track of how many complains a certain person gets called in. Sure, a great idea. What about the guy who crosses the center lane, who is too busy calling this line on his cell phone?

But that is enough complaining for now.

Once in a while there are items of information that we hear, see, or otherwise learn, that may be utterly compelling, or completely innocuous and of exactly no interest. The new information may change our lives completely, with devastating effects that linger onward throughout our lives, or with stunningly profound improvements upon our existence. There is knowledge that can do both. I know of knowledge that has done both. Maybe we will get up tomorrow morning, and this kind of data will leap upon us, and course through our minds and change us forever. Or maybe the information ambush will cause no lasting effects in us at all. Indifference itself can tell us a lot about a person. You see, and I am sure that this you already know, the experience will not promise importance.

The truth is, we will never get up in the morning truly knowing if what we are to experience in this day will be at all redeeming. We have no promises. We only have the hope of a reinforcing experience during the day that will cause us to rise again in the next. We have the memories of yesterday as well. If one goes without these reinforcing experiences for a prolonged period of time, what is it that makes us rise from the bed in the morning and continue to strive for reward? We have no guarantee that this day will bring experiences that will not cause “all the songs to be about you” (Friesen, 1997, 1998). It would seem likely that we have a higher capacity for hope than some might believe.

Maybe there is this feeling within you. A sensation that pervades the daily existence. It is power, but that is not its name. It can create everything that you want. It can take it all away. You cannot control it, either get it to begin, or to get it to leave. You never want it to leave. It can take you from a moment of profound emptiness and ache and fill you with comfort and euphoria. It has done that, and you only hope that it will again in the same way. I meant this to be hope, but I guess it might, in some instances apply to love as well. To lose hope (or love) can have complete and utterly devastating effects upon “life”. This is not a condition that people seem to have all that often. Can we gain the needed experiences without really realizing it? Or are there not just experiences that either satiate or fail to get us this reward, but those that merely keep us going?

I think that it all depends upon yesterday. If yesterday was a complete experience, then maybe today will not have the same needs as if yesterday was not satisfying. Our memories keep us going. And one persons memory of the same event will ultimately have a different effect upon one person from another. A pertinent example of this would be a morsel of knowledge that I gleaned from my Environmental Toxicology class last week. It seems that the most “efficient” route for a poisonous or otherwise toxic substance to enter the male body via dermal exposure (through the skin) is through the scrotum. To me, this was not particularity interesting information. I am not one to whom knowing this has any perspective. However, if you happened to wake up this morning, a strange powdery, or perhaps liquid substance not where it should be, coupled with unusual bouts of nausea or intense sickness, the story may be different. This information may have been a stunning revelation. This may actually have changed your life. Maybe have caused you to limit somebodies access to this particular area of your frame. I don’t know. I just know that this was not exactly information that caused me to go one way or the other. This was not data of any importance. It all depends upon your perspective. New information can trigger a good, bad, or neutral memory experience for tomorrow.

There is information that I may learn and cannot begin to comprehend why I did not realize it before. For example, take the experience of the “9 Items or Less” lane at the local Crappymart. You know that you need to have “9 items or less” when you are in this lane. I think that you probably didn’t know that there are those out there who think that this would render all the other lanes “more than nine items”. Don’t you DARE take less than nine items through these other lanes you clumsy oaf! Imagine the tragedy of this mistaken assumption. So this information may have a rather forcible impact upon a persons grocery shopping experience. To others, this may be innocuous information. Tomorrow will tell.

I think that I have heard enough of all that complaining about how the time change has “screwed” you up in some manner or another. Get over it, its not like you just got off the plane from some distant location like Australia or something. If we shifted the time ten hours, then fine, but thats clearly not the way it is.

It look like I might just have to actually complete some of the section of my page that were, shall we say – “under construction”. Empty is another way to put it. Now that people actually seem to be reading what I write here, and I no longer can feel like this page is merely a conversation with myself, I might have to add/enhance the content. I also might want to use my gooder English once in a while?

I actually spend much of Saturday in the library at SFU doing research. Unfortunately this was for my own interest, which does not seem indicative of my having much of a life. Oh well. I was mainly concerned with adverse health affects of the British Columbian government dumping a bacterial insecticide on us from the sky. The aerial spraying of Bacillus thuringiensis (kurstaki) or BTK is aimed at eradicating the gypsy moth problem that seems to be developing in the area. I have heard mumblings in the Biology department that this might actually help control the spread of the gypsy moth (which eats the timber that the foresters want to cut down) but will also be of consequence to bird populations in the area. I was also concerned that all the acetone that we dump down the drain in my Organic Chemistry lab is really a good thing, and if this is not a contributing factor to either health problems on me and my classmates parts, or to the environment that this stuff is released into. Thirdly I was asked the other day by a fellow student from another school whether it would be good to pack a dead halibut in Formulin (Formaldehyde solution) if it would be undergoing a toxicology test later on. The question was whether this Formalin would interact with any chlorophenols (used in, among other things wood preservatives) that were being tested for. All this work on Saturday, and all I got was more questions, although acetone is probably responsive for my dizziness, headaches etc. that I get during lab. All of this research, and I didn’t even get a lousy T-shirt!