This week I managed to go golfing twice! This might not be possible in most of the rest of Canada at this point in the year, yet here in the Vancouver area it is around 10 degrees C above zero and sunny! Now, the rest of my life sucks right now, as I am trying to find a new place to live since the rise of the rodent infestation in my place. This is going badly, and I don’t expect I will be able to find a place by the end of the month. Damn. Still…. I went golfing!
Earlier I came up with the idea that the making of a New Year’s resolution would become much more effective if I followed a few guidelines. Now, lets point out first that my New Year’s resolution was to run in several races (approximately 10k each) and to prepare myself for said races. Actually following through on such assertions have proved to be an insurmountable obstacle in past years. So, I managed to come up with these ideas:
1. Tell other people about my New Year’s resolution.
2. Actually find someone else to run with (its just a little less boring that way).
3. Set a goal (ie. 10k in around 50 minutes).
4. Actually PAY for entrance in some races – a monetary motivator as well as the possibility of public embarrassment.
Immediately I became aware of a flaw in this strategy- it worked. You see, to present this kind of thing to others, only to have it fail, at least illustrates some effort in the process. However, since this strategy worked, I have been running…. running… and running. Well, a victim of my own invention, I was immediately harassed by those who I had told I would soon begin running. Are you running yet? Have you gone for a run? Where have you been running? How fast do you run a mile? Are you going for a run today? And on and on. Actually, ALL of the above steps have been successful, with the exception of the last one. Its not as though I haven’t tried, it just that I haven’t gotten others motivated and down to the point where we will actually enter a race. I fully expect this to occur within weeks, but it hasn’t happened yet. There was one race I was planning on running here in Vancouver, but due to the failure of some friends to NOT schedule their wedding plans around MY running plans, it will not be something I am able to do. Shucks.
Still, there are plenty of other races, both here and in the Valley, and by paying for entrance to such races, I hope to motivate myself beyond the three times a week running I am doing now. Is there an endorphin junkie lurking within me somewhere?
I am not someone who swears out loud very often. Well, not with the “worse” words anyway. I don’t see the point in doing it. It bothers me when others do it (except perhaps when they have a good reason). So, imagine my surprise when I found myself getting a warning from the security ape at the Royal Skank about it. The suggestion was along the lines that, if I did it again, I would be asked to leave. What had happened was, while at the bank machine, I “asked it” for 20 dollars, which it gave. However, what came out looked and felt like play money, with some kind of weird redesign on it. I cannot adapt well to change, and looking at the new Canadian 10 dollar bill, I exclaimed: “What the fuck is this?” While I did not dive to the depraved depths of yelling “I can’t take it anymore!!” out loud in public, it was still a profoundly diminished moment of my integrity, such as it is.
Actually having something happen to you that you have seen in others, and found inexcusable, often changes your own perspective on the event. So when I see people with wet… “spots” on their clothing, I feel differently than I used to, because it has happened to me.
Imagine standing up in a moderately crowded cafeteria only to become painfully aware of a growing “damp” area just below your waist. Now, I can blame this on the rather vast quantities of iced tea that I drink, yet having clothing soiled in such a manner, publicly no less, is not an experience that I would with upon anyone. I also blame the problem on wide mouth cans they are forcing upon us these days – so that we can force even more of their overly-expensive beverage payload down out gullets. The problem, you see, is that when I am even slightly inattentive to the wide mout presentation of a can’s opening, I tend to misalign my mouthparts and the opening. This can create spills, as it did last week. You’ve really gotta watch those wide mouth cans – they’ll strike when you least expect it.