Yelling, at the wrong car, with bad pizza

The other day I was studying in an SFU cafeteria and was party to an interesting conversation, if you can call it that. A girl asked this guy she was eating with (presumably boy-“friend”) to get her a chocolate bar. When he came back, she yelled out loud : “why can’t you get me a chocolate bar that doesn’t resemble a piece of shit!” This was alarming, and caught the attention of many. She is right, of course. However, I don’t know who I feel more sorry for 1) him – obviously he is attracted to abuse, since I think this is likely not an isolated incident, or 2) myself – because I have had a few chocolate bars since and the previously gratifying experience has been somewhat tainted by the earlier reference. At least I don’t hang around with….. “that”.

I have decided, today in particular, that my “skill” of remembering exactly what happened on particular noteworthy days is not something that I always enjoy. Today it downright sucks. I have realized that sometimes even good memories should be forgotten. Sometimes, Mike, why can’t you just forget? Sure, some people can remember doing a particular activity on a certain day a number of years ago. I, however, can remember exactly what people ordered for dinner, wore, said, and what route I took to driving somewhere. I am not sure exactly why this happens, but as soon as I notice the date (the dates of “interest” at least) I remember all kinds of things. The real kicker is that I cannot seem to remember simple things like to eat dinner, or breathe when I am running. Dammit! I was going out to my car in the SFU parking lot last week, tired from a lab that lasted 5.5 hours (Limnology lab = poor instructions, good TA’s, time better spent doing other things). So I walked up to my car, opened the door, and got in. I, being my usually perceptive self, realized that something was wrong when I noticed that the interior of the car was a light grey color. Normally, this wouldn’t be an issue, except the inside of MY car is blue. Needless to say, this was alarming and took me a few seconds to fully absorb. I had used my key to unlock the door. Well, I immediately vacated what, I was pretty sure, was NOT my car. Apparently, there is another red Subaru station wagon with a roof rack and rear deflector in the SFU parking lot, and it has a door that my key will open. Hmmm….. I remember being able to open other Subaru vehicles with my key, but unable to start them. If I had not immediately vacated the interior of this car, I might have at least tried to start it, first checking to see if any potential owners were in the area. While I find this particular revelation about my keys interesting, I do not wish this knowledge upon the actual owner of the car. First off, he/she probably wouldn’t like that I can open their car whenever I want and secondly, I don’t want them to be tempted to attempt to open mine. Perhaps they already have. What followed this particular event was even more bizarre. When I got home, in my usual parking spot in front of my house, was a red Subaru station wagon, roof rack, and rear deflector. What????? I stopped my car in the middle of the road and just stared. Someone taught me a word a few years ago : surreal. I think this applied. Of course, despite my initial confusion, this was a car of someone visiting my landlord. So I parked behind them, but sadly, never was present when they emerged from the house to see two nearly identical cars on the street. Hey – nice car!

The food at the SFU cafeterias sucks. This might be the case with a great many cafeterias in Universities and Colleges, but it is still something that bothers me – especially considering how much they charge for the crap they expect us to eat. The terms LeadBreadTM and SandMuffinsTM have sprung from exactly this manner of frustration. One of the last places of solace in terms of SFU food has been the pizza served in just one cafeteria on campus. UBC has pretty good pizzas too, in the SUB. However, recently, this pizza at SFU completely sucks (wanna bet that UBC’s is still good?). Now, if I can make a great pizza, and in my opinion I can, then anybody should be able to. Apparently, they changed where they get/make pizzas, and the resulting flaccid tomato covered discs just simply are not worth the effort. For starters you have to put something in the sauce other than just tomatoes (nearly fell into the Dan Quayle landmine there!). The following will be immediately apparent to anyone who has ever attended SFU. Of course, while decreasing the “quality” of such pizza they have…. wait for it…… increased the price! Great! I have noticed an alarming trend in recent courses I have taken. Since most of my courses are now fourth year, most of the students in them have been around nearly as long as I have. However, being the recipients of all kinds of background knowledge on a multitude of topics, I have noticed a trend to overthink very simple problems. For example, in the previously mentioned 5.5 hour lab, we couldn’t do a simple dilution calculation. You have X concentration of liquid, you want to make 1 L of Y concentrated liquid. How much of X do you want to add to water? This, at best, is a grade 11 chemistry problem. I figured out the right answer immediately, but we were all sure that it was wrong (myself included). No, no, no – it can’t be that simple….. So we thought about it. We conferred with other groups, they didn’t know either. What the hell is this? I think that my brain is finally full, and the new information coming in one ear is just indiscriminately displacing some of the old, which falls out the other ear. Maybe I can stop remembering what happened on certain days now….

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